Retro Game Cartridge Soap Will Clean Out Your Wallet | Fanboys Anonymous

Retro Game Cartridge Soap Will Clean Out Your Wallet

Posted by Michelle Quillen Friday, December 13, 2013
You might think that soap shaped like a game cartridge would be the perfect gift for a gamer. It might also be a subtle hint that the recipient should shower him- or herself with actual water rather than achievements. While the former is pretty accurate, the latter ruse would be futile. Why? Because when you use soap, IT MELTS AWAY.

Donkey Kong Country Super Nintendo novelty retro arcade games

Who would want to dissolve a design such as this Super Nintendo cartridge for the sake of being clean? People who want to wash $21 worth of nostalgia down the drain, that’s who! There’s a purpose for the detailed label and ridges. This mix of lye and animal fat is crafted to be an identifiable symbol of your youth. It’s like that pot leaf-shaped decorative candle that you bought at the head shop thinking that lighting it would add ambiance to your room. Then when you go to light it, you realize, “like, wait, then it won’t be pot leaf-shaped.” So while it goes without saying that gamers are infamously unclean, gifting them with Mario Kart suds will have them racing into your arms more than into the bathtub.

Gameboy puzzle game childhood Firebox exclusive life-sized

Then there are these adorable GameBoy cartridge–sized soaps for that little void in your life that the palm-sized beauty bars from the hotel could never quite fill. It wouldn’t take a lot to liquefy this $11 replica of road trip redemption, so treat it like an actual game and keep it away from water. In fact, treat it like a Gremlin, because if it gets wet, it'll be all over the place.

Racing game decorative soap collectible pre-order online 2014 release

The good news is that you can satisfy your discerning game palate by choosing from the several different titles available for both versions, including Donkey Kong Country, Street Fighter II Turbo, The Legend of Zelda, and Pokemon. The bad news is that you have to preorder them, so they won’t be able to gather dust on your game shelf until 2014. You can receive a notification as soon as they’re available by giving the nice people at Firebox your e-mail…and of course your monies.

Think you could bring yourself to wash up with a life-sized piece of your past? Let us know in the Comments below.
THIS POST WAS WRITTEN BY A GUEST WRITER

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